The Grapevine
Number 117                                                                        
November 19, 2005
Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth
not to be ashamed rightly dividing the word of truth. II Timothy 2:15

The Addiction of Selfishness
by Jack Northart

The word, "selfishness" is defined in the dictionary as "stinginess resulting from a concern for your own welfare and a disregard for others." For the most part, selfishness is not something that most people are afraid of having in their own lives, but they are afraid of the selfishness of others. For many people, selfishness is how they live their lives. They say things like, "you've got to look out for number one," or "if I don't watch out for me, who will?" These statements are assuming that no one is going to be concerned for our welfare but us, so we must scratch and claw and fight for whatever we can get in this life. We can't afford to be generous with anything because once it is gone, that's all there is. This way of thinking is an addiction to the ideal that there is only so much to go around and when we don't, or can't get our fair share of whatever it is, we are destitute and must look to others to take care us.

This is the addiction of selfishness, and without God it is extremely difficult to rid it out of a person's life. The withdrawal symptoms seem almost unbearable to some, therefore they will just remain under the control of selfishness, rather than change. This is because there is only one way to recover from the grips of selfishness, and most people are not willing to do what it takes to live this way.

Ephesians 5:1,2
Be ye therefore followers [imitators] of God, as dear children;
And walk in love, as Christ also hath loved us, and hath given himself for us an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweetsmelling savour.

To begin with, a person must become a child of God by accepting the Lord Jesus Christ, (Romans 10:9). After doing this, they must begin to recognize who they are as God's child and start to walk in love. To walk in this love of God is truly the only recovery from addiction to selfishness.

I John 3:16
Hereby perceive we the love of God, because he laid down his life for us: and we ought to lay down our lives for the brethren.

The charitable heart of the child of God is the opposite of selfishness and transcends every aspect of life.

Verses 23
And this is his commandment, That we should believe on the name of his Son Jesus Christ, and love one another, as he gave us commandment.

To walk in the love of God means that we look beyond our own selfishness, and walk in love toward our brethren in Christ. As we do so, selfishness is burned up in the process. To walk in this love of God is more than just giving of our physical resources to help others. It is a deliberate decision to give of our lives.

The word, "charity" in I Corinthians 13 is the Greek word agape, and means the love of God.

I Corinthians 13:3-4
And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity [love of God], it profiteth me nothing. Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,

Clearly, the love of God has no attachment to selfishness whatsoever. Even though we might give to every good cause out in the world, it is not a substitute for walking in the love of God.

Verse 5
Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil.

The Greek word for "thinketh" in this verse is logizomai, which means "to form a conclusion, or judgement." We get the English word "logic" from this Greek word. We are to take no account of, or pay any attention to other people's faults, failures, shortcomings or wrongdoings. Even though others may have wronged us, we don't look at that as a reason to pass judgement on them. That's walking in the love of God. That is walking without selfishness in our lives. That rids us of the addiction of the "looking out for number one" syndrome.

Walking in this love of God is actively useful. It is not reacting to circumstances that come along, but rather seeks out opportunity to help, serve and bless others. Jesus instructed:

Colossians 3:12-14
Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering;
Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye.
And above all these things put on charity [the love of God], which is the bond of perfectness.

Living our lives in this manner brings out so much joy. It gives life an excitement and a thrill.

John 15:9-12
As the Father hath loved me, so have I loved you: continue ye in my love.
If ye keep my commandments, ye shall abide in my love; even as I have kept my Father's commandments, and abide in his love.
These things have I spoken unto you, that my joy might remain in you, and that your joy might be full. This is my commandment, That ye love one another, as I have loved you.

When people are addicted to a narcotic, it is very difficult for them to face the reality of the destruction it causes. This destruction is not only to their own lives, but to everyone around them. Furthermore, the thought of withdrawal from their addiction tends to drive them deeper into the drug's effects. The same could be said about an addiction to selfishness.

God makes it possible for us all to come up and out of the addiction of selfishness without withdrawal symtoms. His love is gentle and kind, and easy to be entreated. His love in our lives has an immediate, as well as overall impact on our lives. As we walk in this love of God, we manifest His very nature to the world around us.

I John 4:16
And we have known and believed the love that God hath to us. God is love; and he that dwelleth in love dwelleth in God, and God in him.